But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
