i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
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