I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Randomize