grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
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