If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
Randomize