She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
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