Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
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