i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
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