found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
foreskin is a definite game changer
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize