Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
Randomize
