just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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