just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
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