I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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