Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
