Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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