Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Randomize
