I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
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