You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
