We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Randomize
