Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
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