She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize
