It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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