I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
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