She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
That was an excessively violent trivia night
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
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