So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
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