hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize