This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
