Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
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