The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize