I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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