It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
he was CRYING into my vagina
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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