My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize