I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize
