we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Randomize
