I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Randomize
