you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Randomize
