Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
Randomize
