I want to stick my p in your. b.
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize