isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
