I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
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