I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
Randomize
