Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
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