I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
