Are we in a gay sports bar?
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
