i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize
