Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
