You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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