i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
