How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize
