what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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