Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
This is my gift to your gina
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Randomize